How to be inwardly and outwardly Hygge

Over the past couple months I have really been thinking about 'happiness' and what it means to feel happy and content. Whether there is solution and if so, how do I go about achieving this?  I think it is partly due to the fast paced nature of modern life but also the fact we are always 'digitally connected' that our brains always seem to be in another realm. With continuous discussion and interaction on social media, we never really do just 'switch off'. It was in my effort to disconnect and heal my worried and anxious mind that I stumbled across two books that have had real influence on my new approach to happiness but also my new approach to really taking care of myself.

 I had always been aware that the Danish were supposedly one of the happiest nations however I had never really into why or how they achieved this. After purchasing 'The little book of Hygge' and 'The little book of Lykke'  by Meik Wiking, I feel as though I now have a much better insight into the reason for this happiness and it feels as if I have reached some sort of Danish awakening or enlightenment. I hope you are now also picturing a little Danish Buddha with a cosy woollen blanket looking content whilst eating a cinnamon whirl....

There are many logical reasons for the Danes to be happy nation, despite the high taxation they are thus rewarded with both free health care and free university education but from what I can gather it is the concepts of hygge and lykke which truly makes the Danish way of life so distinct. Woollen blankets, candles and hot beverages, it is this notion of being cosy and indulgence that comes to mind when first looking at the concept of hygge. From what I have discovered however is it is much more than this. It is an awakening to simple pleasures in life and looking after yourself, yes it involves drinking hot beverages and blankets but it is much more about how you feel and how present you are in that moment. It is about feeling content through taking part in these activities that warm the soul and effect your mood. The closest concept I can use to describe this is 'Christmas'. The warmth, the indulgent food, the gathering of friends and family and being together, this is all very hygge. The Danes do not simply have this mentality at Christmas time however, they encompass it in every season and have ways of creating this sense of happiness and well being all year round.

As I was reading I found there were many different instructions on how to maintain this level of happiness however a few really hit home with me. One simple example of this was how the lighting in your room can effect your mood. According to Wiking, Danes will never have the main light on, instead opting for lamps and candles. It is therefore unsurprising Copenhagen has burnt down three times! I also think this is down to their love for authentic wooden furniture but there we are. Wiking explains the reason for this obsession with lighting is that it creates a much calmer environment which can immediately lift your mood. I know this to be true because after reading the entire chapter within the book on lighting I purchased a new IKEA lamp. Maybe I am a sucker for consumerism and in reality Wiking is just helping out his Scandinavian buddies who run IKEA with increasing lamp and candle sales, but it made me feel better so screw it.

I do feel at this point the need to stress again that although the book focuses on these materialistic things and items that are hygge such as exposed wooden furniture that remind you of nature, pillows, candles and lamps from IKEA, it is so much more than this. It is much more of a mindset and an outlook rather than just simply buying materialistic things to achieve a hygge environment. It is about taking that time, even just making a cup of tea and curling up with a good book. Such simplistic activity that really can help the mind and happiness levels. Another aspect of 'hygge' which appealed to me was that to enjoy these things yes you can do it alone but it is far more hygge to do so in a small intimate group and enjoy these simple life pleasures together. It is about togetherness and  being present, be in that moment and enjoy with people that you love and be grateful for that moment. This incorporates a degree of mindfulness but in doing so it also incorporates other things that I love, including my love of caffeine and adorable blankets (standard hygge practice).  To me this is a far easier and enjoyable activity than meditation which I feel exposes my mind and anxieties.

Within 'The Little Book of Hygge' I feel like I had an introduction manual to the physical ways of achieving this way of life and it would occasionally explain the psychological benefits of these activities but it was in the 'The Little Book of Lykke' by Wiking that he went even further into what it means to be happy. In this book Wiking really explores how the Danish approach to life can improve our levels of well being and happiness. The book looks at togetherness but also money, health and the concept of freedom impacting our mental state. This approach to life explored in his work on hygge comes to fruition as he explains that you do not need to be rich by any means to experience this happiness. I loved how he explained in Denmark it is frowned upon to be lavish and to flaunt ones wealth. Simple activities bring people of various socio-economic status together and there is a humble nature to it. One example of this, is that despite your wage most people in Denmark chose to ride bikes than drive cars, rich or poor there is a feeling of oneness in society with everyone equal in their commute.

 'A developed country is not a place where the poor have cars. It's where the rich walk and where they use bikes. We should create cities where rich and poor meet as equals, in parks, on the pavements, on public transport'. 

With this level of harmony and outlook it is evident that success is not something to brag about in Denmark and in essence there isn't the same pressure as in Britain and America to be consumed by a search for wealth and status. Wiking does not suggest there are not rich successful people in Denmark but the mentality that wealth determines your levels of well being is viewed very differently by the Danes. This can be epitomised in the phrase 'buy memories not things' which I have tried to adopt over the past couple months and will continue to pursue now in the lead up to Christmas. Rather than buying materialistic things for people, which do not get me wrong can bring some level of happiness but a materialistic gift brings temporary happiness whereas a memory spent with someone you love can last a lifetime and surely that is the ultimate gift to someone.

My plan for Christmas this year is to spend as much time as possible making memories with my boyfriend, best friend, friends and family and not be consumed or stressed by the materialistic things I can get them. I'll enjoy going for a gingerbread latte and try to be mindful of the activity whilst doing so, enjoy the moment for what it is and not be consumed with thoughts of other future moments or worries. I've also tried over the past few weeks to really make an effort with my room and make this a hygge environment - not just so it is visually pleasing but that it works as a safe space for my head to unwind. I feel like a lot of people feel the need to go out in order to feel like they are making the most of their free time, a sort of "where can I go and what an I do next" attitude. We are so consumed by the need to show we are living to others and thinking about what we should be doing with our time that we do not actually take moments to enjoy and live it. The Danish way has taught me the importance of self love, to enjoy the little things and not care about the material. So ladies and gentleman yes it is about bikes, candles, comfy clothing and dinner parties with friends but it is in essence a feeling and an attitude. An attitude that I plan to channel both outwards in my environment and inwards in my mind. I shall be inwardly and outwardly Danish.